Blog 11 "Loyal"

Harrison Cade
Essay 2 draft
Loyal

I think it is very funny how life works. If you actually sit back and watch things in your life unfold, you will truly be blown away. It feels like someone is putting me in different situations and putting certain people in my life for who knows what reason. I ask myself all the time, “why are in my life.” I don’t always come up with the right answers to the questions, but I will just say that the time that it takes for me to figure it out has been a gift. I try to learn things from the people that I keep around me, good or bad. The funny thing is, I sometimes learn about myself and the things that I will put up with. I guess a good way to figure out what it is about people is to figure out why they are in my friend zone in the first place. I am actually speaking about one person. I have been through a lot of extra drama on his account and for years I have wondered why I do it to myself. I honestly don’t have to deal with it, but I do. The whole thing started in middle school.
It was eighth grade year when I kept hearing about this seventh-grader who supposed to be an amazing running back. Every other day I heard his name along with his stats and accolades. I never met him until later in the year. It was very nice to meet him because he just seemed so cool and we just clicked. We didn’t hang out that much because we had different friends at the time but I knew we would be cool in high school. We both had plans to play football in the neighboring high school so it wouldn’t be the last time I saw Kj.
I didn’t see him my freshman year of high school obviously because he was still in the middle school. At this time I was playing junior varsity football. I was playing in a game when I sprained my ankle. The injury wasn’t too serious, I just couldn’t practice for a few days. One of the days that I missed from practice was the day when I got a chance to see Kj play. As I limped around, my coach told me to be in charge of the first down markers in the freshman football game. I didn’t feel like doing it but at least I got to watch this young phenom play. I tell no lies when I talk about football, but this kid was a monster. I didn’t know what to say because I didn’t believe what I was watching.
Sometimes there are times when you think someone is lying to you but you don’t want to believe it. Kj was becoming one of the same people that I tried to stay away from. I believe that you are the company you keep. I didn’t want to be seen with a bunch of liars. I heard story about some of the lies that Kj told other people. As soon as they figured out that Kj was a liar, they all started to cut him off one by one. The whole time that this was happening, I was defending him and convincing these people that he wouldn’t do things like this. Even if I would love friends of mine because of him, it seemed ok to me. For some reason, I felt like it was my job to play the big brother role and keep him out of the trouble that he would create. I was never given this responsibility from anyone, but sometimes it all just falls into place.
I was home for the weekend when I got a call from Kj. I knew something was wrong because of the hour that he called. Kj told me to get up and drive to some kid’s house for some fight. I was about to get out of my bed as I began to feel weird. Something sounded funny with his story. Kj was telling me a few names of people that were supposedly at this kid’s house. One of the names that I heard was a close friend of mine named Joey that I knew wouldn’t be at a place like that. I decided to called Joey and ask him what the situation was. I didn’t want to sound obvious about what I was calling for, so I began talking about something else. Eventually, I asked Joe when the last time he saw Kj was. Joey told me that he hasn’t seen him in a year. This was when things started to seem real to me. I never thought that Kj would lie to me of all people, but now I know. I felt so hurt because I felt like all the time that spent helping this kid out was for nothing. So I left him alone for a while.
In college it is easy to get so involved with things that you forget to stay in touch with those who are still at home. It was a few weeks since I saw Kj last. I was in my room anxious to get to bed when my cell phone lit up. There were three text messages that might as well been pages from Kj. From what I was reading, it seemed like I was the only one that he felt that he could confide in. His words were so dark and sad at the same time. He was talking bout giving up on his life and how life would be without him in it. At first was shocked, but I couldn’t take too long to respond because every minute counts in this situation. I picked up my phone and started pressing buttons so fast you would think I was a pianist. I said some things that were motivational, but I let him know that he is in control of what he does in this world. Kj was capable of doing so much better for himself, but he was too busy getting into his own way. Needless to say, I talked him out of doing something horrible. This situation took a serious toll of me because I was sitting feeling like I could’ve been the last person that he talked to. I was worried and sweating all because I felt that it would be my fault if something happened to him.
Every time that I go home I make sure that Kj is ok and has everything that he needs. The harsh truth about this matter is that, sometimes I have views of him ending up in jail or worse. A question that I have to ask myself is why do I put myself through so much pressure. I am not this kid’s father or relative. I am just his friend that cares about him. Friendships are very funny sometimes. I remained friends with someone who treated myself and others worse than enemies would.

Blog 10

For my next essay I feel like i want to write about the strength of some friendship and why people put themselves through hell for their friends sometimes. I am still going through some type of this issue to this day. I like to write about things that I don't understand. I don't understand why people do what they do. I figured others would want to read about something like this as well. The things that people would do for their friend is amazing. I'm focusing on how strong a friendship is and how loyal people can be even if the same treatment isn't given to them.

Blog 9

My ideas about telling my story in great detail went well in my essay. I wanted the reader to feel like they were right next to me when things happened. During the conference we went over many new ideas that could help make my essay more powerful. I have decided to take out some things in the story that weren't as important as the new ideas. I will add more detail to some of the parts of th story. I dont want to feel like I left too much information out. I feel like the finished product will blow the old essay out of the water.

BLog 7

The truth in O'Brian's essay is interesting because reality sucks. The truth is that war stories could never provide the absolute truth because you can never tell a story about something that happened exactly how it happen. Honestly, there is most likely thousands of different stories about the same exact thing. Every person sees things diffrently which gives them freedom to tell their story in their own way. Each version is slanted, this is why you can't believe everything that you read and hear. Also, in this essay I learned that when something is so horrible, it makes it that much more difficult to tell the story. Hopefully, the writer isn't crazy and didn't just add randum things that never happened.

blog 6

i think both "Out there" and "Alive" seem like the type of essay that I would write. I like how the narrator talks as if they are right in front of you. It gives me the freedom to go in any direction and be as specific as I want to be. Like these essays, the readers will get something from the story and possibly learn something. In "Out there", I had an idea where the story was going. In my essay I want to leave clues to keep the reader interested.

Blog 8 Personal essay called "Focus"

Harrison Cade
Writing Creative Non-fiction
Personal Essay
Focus

I used to believe that some things were impossible to do in real life. Certain things belong on television and our imagination. To be honest, I was so stubborn that I wouldn’t believe something was real until I saw it or could touch it. My mindset changed the day I decided to play football outside with my best friend. Football to me was just something to do instead of my homework. I wasn’t one of those kids who went above and beyond to get the good grades in school. I was young so my first plans were to go outside and play and then decide whether or not to do my homework.
I was sitting in my house wondering what my next moves were going to be when my friend came over gasping for air. It was hard to understand what he was saying at first because he had run full speed all the way to my house. He came over to tell me that our rivals from down the street challenged us to a game of football. Little did I know that this game would mark the beginning of my football career and the start of some strange behavior that I never thought was possible. Before we left to go down the street, we listened to some music from the Rocky soundtrack to get ourselves in the zone. It was now game time, time to take what was ours. It was time to take the one thing that many people never get a chance to gain. I wanted to end up coming home with respect. We arrived at the field on time and ready to go to war. We played two on two football, one quarterback and one receiver. My friend Mike had a good arm so he chose to be the quarterback. I wanted to be the receiver because I felt that these guys couldn’t stop me in a million years. I lined up to Mike’s right and had so many things running through my mind. In my mind, I was telling myself that this kid across from me can’t run as fast as I can that he couldn’t cover me. Mike said “go” and I took off. I not only had to avoid one guy, but I had to deal with his team mate as well. I put a move on one of them and saw that the ball was in the air. When the ball was thrown, things started happen to my body. I felt like everything slowed down and got very quiet. This feeling was so strange that it almost felt like I was in a white room with nothing in it but myself, the ball, and a gut trying to stop me from catching it. For the few seconds that the ball was in the air, I felt like a lifetime was going by. The ball was slowly getting closer and closer. When the ball came within my arms length things got serious because now it was me against the defender and I was not losing. I jumped as high as I could and grabbed the ball out the sky. When the ball touched my hand I came back to reality and outran both of my defenders to the end zone. I never actually thought about what happened until recently, but now that I think about it maybe I should’ve mentioned this abnormal behavior to someone. The rest of the game had similar situations occur to the point where I became comfortable with it.
My next move was to play football in high school. I went from playing football instead of homework to actually being a part of a team. This meant that I had to trust others as much as they trust me. I was responsible for my level of play. I wasn’t on varsity for the first two years of high school because I wasn’t taking things too seriously. I was just playing junior varsity games just because it was fun and all of my friends were playing too. Something I didn’t notice until now was that I didn’t have the weird feeling when I wasn’t taking things serious. My junior varsity team went undefeated and nobody cared about it but us. Junior varsity didn’t tell me anything except work harder. I learned at a young age how to take everything into perspective. I realized that there were many things that I could change mentally and physically. I had an immature attitude and wasn’t taking things serious like I needed to. I decided to go with some of my teammates to Louisiana for “The Manning Passing Camp.” This camp was run by one of the more famous families in sports. Peyton Manning and his brother Eli held a camp that was mainly focused on discipline and focus. I played against some of the best high school players in the country and was coached by NFL coaches. I learned how to catch the ball properly and run routes the right way. I was surrounded by NFL players and coaches for about a week. I also got a chance to see how important it was to ply with certain level of focus and intensity.
When I returned home from camp, a different kid with a different personality came home. I worked harder and harder every day because I realized that I am in control of my performance and how far it takes me. It was now time to find out what I can do on the varsity team. Once I began my senior season, my confidence level was off the charts. I went from being a decent athlete to a key player. My team made it all the way to the state championship. We lost the game, but I played the best game of my life at that point. During my senior year there was talk about me playing college football. I didn’t believe that I could make it that far until I went to that camp. I was beating kids that were getting scholarships to play at division 1 schools. My attitude was more mature because I took things seriously.
I chose to go to a school that didn’t have a history of being a powerhouse. I wanted to help bring a team from the bottom to the top so I could feel like I made difference. There was a school in north jersey that wasn’t my number one choice but it fit the qualities of the type of school I wanted. College was a big deal for me because I was now playing against grown men who were fighting for a championship. Everything was faster and everyone was bigger. I had to adjust to this style of play pretty fast in order to actually get on the field. I had my difficult times just like everyone else. I was knocked out a few times and went through pain that I never felt before. I saw first- hand how serious this game is to some of these men. To some of them, football was all they hand to call their own. Some guys came from a broken home and their families were out of control. Football was the only good thing that made them happy. Each year was very important to each guy because unless they were going to play professional ball, football was over for them. After football they would have to be a regular person in the real world. At that point I got another wake-up call. I suddenly thought about what I want to do with football. If I wanted to play professionally, I would need to play so much better than others in our conference. My freshman and sophomore year went ok, I didn’t play too much because they valued the upper classmen. I was only on special teams and some plays on offense. I needed to work harder in the offseason.
It was junior year now, we had a game against one of our rivals. I was in the zone as soon as I got off the bus. It was a night game and the lights were on with bleachers full of fans. The crowd was wild all night because they hated us. It was the second half when it happened. I was lined up with a defender in front of me and another defender about fifteen yards back. My body started feeling weird again. As soon as I heard “hut” I took off in a straight line. I ran right passed one of the defenders and then everything slowed down. I was younger the last time this situation happened, but now it was more important that I have the same result. I saw the ball at the last possible second. The ball landed perfectly into my hands without any adjustment. I took off for about fifty yards. The difference between now and then was that I actually chose to tell someone about this strange occurrence. My dad was amongst the many fans that were at the game and we had our routine post-game conversation. I told him what happened and he wasn’t even surprised. He told me it was a gift. This is when it all started to make sense to me. I learned something about myself and life that day. When you focus and believe in something so much, magical things can happen. It may seem weird at first but there is always a reason why things happen. As far as football is concerned, I was given the ability to slow things down and intensely focus on the ball. In life I can do the same and intensely focus on my goals and decisions.
I turned a gift into tool that I use every day. I still play football at a high level and I still focus on my life and decisions. Each game provides a different set of circumstances that need to be adjusted to, but I deal with each one very well. Life is going throw tons of things our way in order to blind us or take us off our path. It is times like these when we need to slow things down and find out what is more important to us. Once you figure out what is important, you need to make decisions that will support the plan.

Blog 5 Alive

I feel that Drummand's "Alive" was a story used to give people a reality check. Tomorrow is never garunteed and we shouldn't live life like nothing could ever happen to us. There are strange people in the world that would have nothing to lose if they hurt someone. Even though in the story, the strange person turned onto a different road, the woman still felt vulnerble. Being a police officer doesn't make u less afraid. Being alive is a gift, and it could be taken away at any time. The structure of this story was interersting because it built suspense. The story started out normal and grew into a real chase.